Remorse?

As I laid and constantly looking up hoping to see the stars, I wondered the meaning of life, love and living. What intrigued me the most how some people can handled problems well, maybe we think to much and has gone deep beyond our imagination to solved our problems. All problems can be solved, yea tell that to friend who has been cheated out of business so many times and he can’t even afford to buy cigarette.
How many times can you fall in and out of love? Ask yourselves what is really love. How many person can you love? We are not talking about the love to our parents and families, we are talking about our love ones. What it takes to fall in love with our “love ones” Lust? That would be fatal, or how many can we love? Can a woman love so many men? Like man can love so many women. After all man can marry four, so man is capable of loving four women, is that the answer? And a woman can love only one? What is if a woman can sleep with so many men and fall in love with only one man, is that possible, so that is lust and it is fatal. No, not unless she is discovered. What the partner don’t know will not hurt him, yea we hear that so many times, so what does make us. I don’t have the answer. So what is really love, what it is based on. We lied and get away all the time but what happened when we are caught and the truth prevailed? Wiggled out hoping to be forgive and then to forget. Mind works in a funny ways, it keep telling and reminding you of such and you regularly wakes up in the middle of the nights thinking about it. The next morning your eyes are fluffy and red and your love one asked you, how come you can’t sleep last night? What s your answer? Because you love your love one so intently you said nothing at all. Bummer !!!! Are you a coward, you asked yourself, no it will all go away eventually and that is what your are trying to convinced yourself or rather cheat yourself and hoping it will get better. It heals with times. Does it really or will it be a time bomb, ticking away and waiting to explode. It all depend on how you handled it, after all we are still the weakling human being. When you say sorry, what does that mean, it means I will not do it again or I won’t repeat it. How many sorry did we say to our love one or worst still saying sorry so many times for the same incidents, Is that a regret or seeking for forgiveness. Alright apologies accepted and does that mean it is forgotten Whatever that started not based on truth or putting it severely on lies, it gets so saturated in our mind, you wonder where is the truth.
Let s talk about regrets. No one and no one can changed what happened to us historically. We can’t changed what we were before. We did wrong, we regretted but some don’t and it kept repeating. It is fine when it does not involved your love one, but what when it did? The question is, does your past haunt you? Or you are still living in your past, not wanting to let go. It is a lesson not only for me but for everyone. Keep holding to the past, you will never regret till the day you are numbered. I can asked a question, have I betrayed, only I have the answer and can I answered with a clear conscience if I choose to answer. Will my pupil dilate, yes it will when I lie. Will my tone changed, yes it will when I lie. Does that mean lies is easy to detect? Yes it does then why the hell does they invent a lie detector if you can tell the different. I wish I could see a person differently. Lies and regret does not coupled as I desperately trying to seek the truth.